Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Feel the fear and doing it anyway.

It's the last week of the summer holiday and then my beautiful girls go back to school. I love the long summer holidays and I'll be sorry to see them go. But I thrive on a good routine and structure so I think the new term will be good for me. What I'm particularly thankful about at the moment is my husband.

He is very inspiring at the moment. He suffers a great deal from shyness, so I have great admiration for him when he does pick up that phone and tries to get work or business. For him the phone is his own personal nemesis, an adversary that he will never beat. I'm sure he will be disappointed if I agree with him. But he's right. Being shy he fears being the first to start the conversation and making those all important calls are difficult. I think to some degree it will always be difficult.

Overcoming your fear, or as the famous book says 'Feeling the fear and doing it anyway' doesn't stop you feeling anxious. Yet, doing something you don't like is powerful stuff. Doing anything new in life is scary — and no one is immune to it. The only way to get through it is to get stuck into the things that terrify you. Whether it’s public speaking, telling a friend how you feel or leaving the job you hate, you have to do the thing you are terrified of. Now! And then never look back.

I was so pleased when he decided it was time to stop avoiding unpleasant and frankly terrifying tasks and just get on with it. I've noticed that it's overflowing to his personal training goals to. Basically he's managed to do what he never got round to reading in the self help book I bought him years ago.


TRUTH ONE: The fear will never go away as long as I continue to grow.
TRUTH TWO: The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it.
TRUTH THREE: The only way to feel better about myself is to go out and do it.
TRUTH FOUR: Not only am I going to experience fear when I’m on unfamiliar territory, but so is everyone else.
TRUTH FIVE: Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness.

The reason I loved Susan Jeffers book is that it was written by a woman telling other women to stop trying to be perfect and have the confidence to just go out there and do something, anything.

Most self-help books tell women how to find the perfect love, Jeffers tells you that there’s no such thing until you find your own happiness. I feel so much pleasure in seeing my lovely husband dismiss what he thinks he should be doing with his time and money and instead is discovering what he wants to do to make himself happy and fulfilled.

How can that be described as anything else other than an amazing success?

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