Last night I was sitting alone in my car in a school car park. I do it a lot these days. Before you get worried it is nearly the end of term and I have two children. Every time we switch on the TV, the joke is on the lazy incompetent Dad. He is completely unable to cope with family life, and stressed Mum always jumps in saving the day. Could you imagine the public outcry if the Dad character was a woman, disabled or from a ethic minority? Dads are safe to laugh at. I know, I've also jumped on the band wagon. I can't help remember how many of these pick ups and drop offs he's done over the years without compliant.
I'm currently really behind on a project. I am sick to death of playing the single mum. At the moment my beautiful girls are in Guides, Youth Explorers, they are both in separate school productions, daughter number one goes to a writing club, daughter number two is on the rounders team and, they are both Young Leaders at church.
For the last couple of months my kids pick up schedule has been something like this:
3:30 pick up
4:30 pick up
7:00 drop off
9:00 pick up
Every night except Fridays and, that's not counting the weekend commitments. I'm miss the 'Dad's taxi.'
So I'm sitting in the car park with ear ache so bad that I'd bought name brand pain killers, not the 32p pack from Wilkinson's. I'm alone on my wedding anniversary looking at a dead frog on the pavement. I swear that if a mans penis decided to go for a walk and got run over - it would look just like that frog. And, I sort of want to find a stick and poke it, but I'm also aware that other parents are waiting in the car park for their children. I feel weird from lack of sleep. I'm debating writing a poem about being a squashed frog - but it's on the school pavement, not the road. Did it meet it's death being trampled by a thousand feet?
AND THEN Tender by Blur came on the radio.....
Every so often in life this happens - well it does to me - when something reaches out and touches you. It is has if it's a special message just for you. It could be a song, a poem, a prayer, a story. I remember going to Tate Gallery in Liverpool sixteen times to see the same picture. Despite hearing Tender before and knowing a few of the lyrics, tonight under a colourless sky I heard it for the first time.
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
And I will - I will get through it.
I immediately bought it off iTunes and played it again. The tension from my shoulders just lifted as the words flowed...
Tender is the night
Lying by your side
Tender is the touch
Of someone that you love too much
Tender is the day
The demons go away
Lord I need to find
Someone who can heal my mind
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
Come on, Come on, Come on
Love's the greatest thing
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
Come on, Come on, Come on
Love's the greatest thing
That we have
I'm waiting for that feeling
I'm Waiting for that feeling
Waiting for that feeling to come
Oh my baby
Oh my baby
Oh why
Oh my
Tender is the ghost
The ghost I love the most
Hiding from the sun
Waiting for the night to come
Tender is my heart
I'm screwing up my life
Lord I need to find
Someone who can heal my mind
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
Come on, Come on, Come on
Love's the greatest thing
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
Come on, Come on, Come on
Love's the greatest thing
That we have
I'm waiting for that feeling
I'm Waiting for that feeling
Waiting for that feeling to come
Oh my baby
Oh my baby
Oh why
Oh my
X2
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
Come on, Come on, Come on
Love's the greatest thing
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
Come on, Come on, Come on
Love's the greatest thing
That we have
I'm waiting for that feeling
I'm Waiting for that feeling
Waiting for that feeling to come
Oh my baby
Oh my baby
Oh why
Oh my
X2
Tender is the night
Lying by your side
Tender is the touch
Of someone that you love too much
Tender is my heart you know
I'm screwing up my life
Oh Lord I need to find
Someone who can heal my mind
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
Come on, Come on, Come on
Love's the greatest thing
Come on, Come on, Come on
Get through it
Come on, Come on, Come on
Love's the greatest thing
That we have
I'm waiting for that feeling
I'm Waiting for that feeling
Waiting for that feeling to come
Songwriters: ALBARN, DAMON/JAMES, STEVEN ALEXANDER/COXON, GRAHAM
I'm over forty, the days of poking dead animals with a stick are over (unless I'm in America - the armadillo experience is another story and one I wouldn't mind repeating.)
I have so much to look forward to. Seeing my first non fiction book in print - going back to uni - and waiting for a tender day when
The demons go away
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=V1YP2ys2bKk&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DV1YP2ys2bKk
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